Lost my Life
by SoaneLucy13
Summary: Bella can’t remember anything of the first twenty years of her life. But she get these vivid dreams, visions almost. Her past. Her little girls. Her Edward.
1. Bella: Lost

**So, here's a new story. Yeah, I know I'm posting often this days. Just to close the gap for my lack of concentration and my small writers block with Sun, BFF's and Love in LA. I had never, ever expected Dating Fame would be so much readed. But now about this story: I really love it. It's pretty drama like. The beginning at least. And in the first chapters, there will hardly be dialogues. I know this chapter is ultra short, but it's kind of an introduction. Enjoy, and review. xxx. **

**Summary:** _Bella can't remember anything of the first twenty years of her life. But she get these vivid dreams, visions almost. Her past. Her little girls. Her Edward._

"_Bella, everything is going to be okay,"_ someone told me. I didn't know his name, but I knew it was the voice of the person I loved.

"_No, it's not!"_ I said, stubborn as always. _"I'm fucking pregnant! Pregnant at eighteen! I even haven't finished high school, Edward."_ So his name was Edward. Then I felt the nausea, and I threw up again. Edward held my hair.

"_Bella, don't worry, love. You won't be alone."_

And then I woke up. I had this kind of dreams every night. I saw them whenever I closed my eyes, sometimes with open eyes, too. I could smell the nausea, I could feel it in my stomach. And those two little angels, they seemed so familiar to me. As if I knew them. I could feel my oldest daughter's curls in my hand, I could picture it's bronze tint.

Three years ago something bad happened to me. I don't know what and I can't remember anything of it. The only thing I can remember is me lying in a hospital bed. They told me I was in San Francisco. I had been brought to a hospital in Seattle, to a hospital in Portland, and then they finally brought me to San Francisco. Okay? I thought.

I was 'adopted' by Billy and Marcella Black, from Phoenix.

Phoenix.

I knew that name.

There was one thing I could remember. My first name. Bella. And the name Nessie, that's all. Just two names.

In my dreams I had two little girls with the most beautiful man in the world. I have 'dreamt' about a beach, where I was with my dad when I was a kid, about the heat, my mom's house, the day I met the love of my life, named Edward, our first time, the pregnancies, his proposal. No wedding.

Didn't I have one? I hadn't had a wedding ring. But that didn't have to mean something. And I remember the births of both the girls. And a date.

August 13.

My life was one big riddle.

I went to a shrunk, who talked about the things I could remember. She had told me I had been in an accident and had hurt my head. My memory had been totally damaged.

Great.

I had lost my memory.

I didn't tell her about the two little girls. I wanted to protect them. Like I was their mother.

Would I ever get to meet them?

I would live for that. For them.

**Review!**


	2. Edward: Hollow

**Chapter 2. Personally, I really love this story, especially the first few chapters. But well, that's my opinion, huh? Here's Edward's POV. **

**Renesmee and Avory are two lucky girls with a dad like Edward. Who wouldn't love to be Edward's little girl? Yeah, I know a lot of you probably want to be his girl, not his little girl. Well, I want to be his little sister. Enough talking. Enjoy. Thanks to everyone who read and faved this story.**

EPOV

It has been three years now. Three years that Bella has disappeared out of my life. Suddenly. One moment I was talking with her on the phone, and the other moment I heard her screaming.

They have found pieces of her car. But no body. Nothing. Not even a piece of her. The car wasn't burnt down, there were no traces of animals...

What had happened to Bella? _My _Bella? My one and only love? My soul? My life?

If it wasn't for my two little miracles, _Bella's _miracles, our miracles, I would have killed myself immediately. I couldn't do that to them. Not after they had lost their mother already. And I owed my family.

I am twenty-four right now. My little girls, Renesmee Carlie and Avory Elizabeth are almost five and three-and-a-half. Yes, I'm technically a teenage dad, but I don't care. At all. I love my girls. They're half Bella. I need them.

I show them as much things of Bella as possible. Videos, photos, her favorite books, CD's, movies, letters, her voice, everything. I want they can remember her. Somehow, Renesmee does. She was almost two when her Mommy vanished.

But she's a very, very clever and wise girl. When I shampooed her hair one day, with the same shampoo Bella always had used, she told me "Just like Momma". Avory was six months, so she can't remember her at all.

They are my full-time job. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. My family tells me I have to find a job, or go to college. Find a new woman, who could be a motherly figure for Ness and Ave. Hell no. I didn't want to loose them – by working or going to college I wouldn't see them for more than 6 hours, or even worse, for a few days. I can't bear that- and they only had one mother. Bella.

Renesmee has my bronze hair color and my features, but she has the curls of her grandpa Chief Swan, or just Charlie, Bella's father.

And Bella's eyes. Renesmee has Bella's chocolate brown eyes. Just as Charlie has, by the way.

I am so grateful for the fact my daughter has the eyes of her mother. Bella has the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen. Thank God, they didn't get lost, after all.

She also has her Mommy's full lips.

Avory has my green Emerald eyes, and a mixture of my mother's caramel and Bella's brown hair color.

Avory is full of life, while her older sister is more like a reader, more tranquil. Renesmee knows very good what she likes and what she dislikes, exepct picking clothes for an event or something. She's also, just as Bella, stubborn as hell.

Renesmee's nickname is Nessie. But Bella had refused to call her like that for the first year of her life –she didn't want to call her daughter after the Loch Ness monster- later she gave in. When Bella disappeared, I stopped calling my daughter Nessie, while before I always called her like that. I hardly used Renesmee. Now it's turned.

We don't have a headstone for Bella, on a cemetery. We had made our own memorial stone. Without a date of death. I have never believed that my fiancée is dead. She's somewhere. I can feel that. Everyone can call me crazy, but it doesn't affect me.

There were women who showed interest in me, but I never noticed.

I would never be together with anyone else than Bella. I couldn't be.

I was looking out of my window, well wall covered it better, since the wall was all of glass. It was one big window, actually.

I needed to talk to 'Bella'.

I heard my little girls downstairs.

I ducked in my sister's room.

Alice was drawing with Renesmee and Ave.

"Time for bed, Avy," I told my youngest daughter.

"No daddy, I'm busy," and she continued with her drawing. Renesmee patted her arm, and glanced over to me, showing her little sister she had to go. "Nessie has to go, too."

"Avory Elizabeth Cullen, if I say bedtime, then it is bedtime. Your sister is one-and-a-half year older than you. When you're just as old as she, you don't have to sleep this early. C'mon, I will read you a story."

That did it for my daughter. "Yeah. Story, story, story Daddy," she said, bouncing up and down. She put out her arms so I could pick her up. She placed her arms around my neck.

"Say goodnight, honey." I bent down, so she could kiss her auntie and sister goodnight.

"Goodnight auntie Alice," she said and kissed my sister on her cheek.

Avory hugged her sister and I got up again. The rooms of my daughters were across mine. I wanted them being close.

"Daddy, may I wear my Cinderalla gown?"

"Of course, sweetheart." I gave her her blue Cinderalla pajamas, and waited till she was finished and had managed to climb up the bed. She ducked under the covers.

"Avory."

"Yes, daddy?" se said, innocently, appearing at the other side of the bed.

"Grammy has just made up your bed, and now you've already ruined it."

"Sorry daddy."

I grabbed hold of her, and pulled her next to me. "Which story do you want?"

"Uh…" and she got a deep V between her brows, just like her mother. She was deep in thoughts.

I chuckled. It was so hilarious to see my three year old daughter deep in thoughts.

"May I look in the room of Mommy and you, for a book?"

"Avory, that aren't books for your age, honey."

"Oh. But may I just look in your room, Daddy?"

"Of course, honey." Renesmee was my angel, and Avory was my honey. I don't know why, it's just how it is.

Avory walked over to my bed, and went to sit on it.

She looked around the room. Certainly she had seen something interesting, because she hopped off the bed and walked to my desk. She tried to climb up the chair. Which wasn't so easy.

"Do you need help, Avory Elizabeth?"

"No, daddy, I'm alright." She had managed to get on the chair, and had placed her elbows on the blade, resting her face in her hands. She was looking to something.

"Daddy, can you tell me how you met Mommy?"

I walked up to her, and bent down till I was on the same level.

Then I saw where my youngest daughter was looking to.

A photo. My most craved photo I owned. It was a photo of Bella, Renesmee and Avory. All smiling.

Avory saw me looking. "That's Mommy, Nessie and me, right, Daddy?"

"Yes."

"My mommy is the most beautiful mom of the world."

I chuckled. Sometimes, I forgot how mature and wise Avory was, especially for her age. "Yes, she is."

"You miss her, huh, Daddy?"

"Yes, I do. Very much."

"It will come okay, Edward." I was stunned. None of my daughters had ever called me Edward. Not even Ed or Eddie. It always was Daddy, or Dad. "You're the best Daddy ever." And she kissed my cheek.

"Thank you, honey."

"Now, will you tell?"

"Sure. C'mon, back to your room."

"Daddy? What are you doing?" I heard my other daughter ask, from the bottom of the stairs.

"We went to take a look at his and Mommy's room, and now Daddy is going to tell me about how he and Mommy met."

"May I listen, too?"

"Of course, my angel."

Renesmee ran up the stairs, and took my hand. "I will take it from here," I told my sister.

Alice nodded her head.

I helped Renesmee with brushing her teeth and hair, and putting on her PJ's. When we re-entered Avory's room, she was sitting at the glass wall with a picture of Bella in her hands. I knew she didn't notice us.

"You know, Mommy, Daddy misses you a lot. And Ness and I do, too. I can't remember you. And that makes me sad, Mommy. I want to be hold by you, I want that you read stories to me. Daddy is a really good storyteller, really, but I wanna hear _your _voice. I really want that Mommy. Daddy has a really good eye for beautiful things, and you're not an exception. I know you're alive somewhere. You're not dead. I believe that you're an angel. And that you're looking down on us, protecting us. Looking after Daddy. He loves you so much. I'm sure you're really proud of him. He's so good for us. Sometimes he needs alone time, and then he always goes to your memorial stone. And he talks to you, I think. I'm almost going to school, and I'm really exited about it. I will make many paintings for you. I love you, Mommy," she said and kissed the photo. She placed it back on her nightstand and ducked under her blankets.

I knocked on the door, letting her know we where here. "You're ready, Avy bee?"

"Yes, Daddy."

I was sandwiched between my girls, and they both had laid their small, but oh so beautiful, heads on my chest.

I took a deep breath, and began. "I met your mommy, Isabella Swan –but she preferred to be called Bella- when we were both seventeen. At high school. Everyone was talking about her…"

"Why, daddy?" Renesmee asked. "Why were they talking about Momma?"

"Because she was new. She had just moved here. It was at lunch, that I first saw her. I was in the queue for the food, when she tripped over something close. And daddy took hold of her, and looked after it that she didn't fall on the ground. She was very beautiful, then already. Secretly, I was already in love with her, since the first time I saw her. We also were Biology partners…" I saw the confused look on Avory's face. "That's a subject, honeybee. I've been drawn to her since that day. We got really close, talked a lot, listened to music, went to concerts, watched movies, made homework together. And slowly we became closer and closer, and on a day we were boyfriend and girlfriend. When you're mommy was eighteen for a couple of months, she started to feel sick. She had to throw up a lot, and had nauseas. I was really worried about her, because I didn't know what was going on and what to do. I couldn't help her. But she was pregnant of you," and I patted Renesmee's head. She looked up to me, and smiled. "Mommy was really shocked, because she was still in high school. But she was also very happy. She was having a little miracle, with me, the guy she truly loved.

She was six months pregnant when we graduated. The birth was very tough for your Mommy, but everything turned out to be okay. Mommy was so stunned by you. You were our little angel. Three days after your birth, on her nineteenth birthday, I asked Mommy if she wanted to become my wife, and she said yes. But she wanted to wait till Renesmee, that's you missy, would be a little bit older. But before you was old enough, Mommy found out she was pregnant again. A few months later, you" I patted my other daughter, "was born."

I saw they were almost asleep. Avory was.

Renesmee still asked me a question. "Tell me why you called me Renesmee, and Avory Avory, please."

I chuckled. Bella and Renesmee both knew exactly how to use the word "please". Like mother, like daughter.

"Momma came up with your name. It's a composition from Renée and Esme, your grandmas. And Carlie is from Charlie and Carlisle, your grandpas. Avory is a variation of Avery. Elizabeth is Alice' second name, and my grandmother's first name."

"Oh." She nestled more in my chest, and I started to hum one of the lullabies I had written for them.

Soon, we were all deeply asleep.

**Review!**

**Avory doesn't know that her father and sister are there, until Edward knocks on the door. She just wanted to talk to her Mommy, just like Edward has to do sometimes. And Edward wanted to talk to Bella, but he was occupied by his girls, and fell asleep. **

**I also don't know how you spell mommy and daddy, if you have to write it with a capital letter or not. So it's a bit varieted now. Sorry for that. As soon as I know for sure I will change it.**

**If you have any other questions, don't shy away.**


	3. Alice: Gone

**Pixie's here! Another shorty. A=Alice, and if Avory will ever get a POV it will be AvPOV. And I know the titles are extremely lame, but I find it really difficult to come up with good titles. That you know.**

APOV

Everyday it crashed me to see Edward. He had never processed the sudden and weird disappearing of Bella, the love of his life, his soul mate, his everything.

He was amazing with the girls, really, but I wasn't dumb. Nobody was. Even his daughters weren't. I could see him suffer. And it hurt me. He, as my older twin brother. He had always been there for me. Always. He helped me with everything. So did I for him.

But this time, I couldn't help him. No one or nothing could. It felt as if I had failed.

The only stars, lights, in his life were Nessie and Ava. They were the reason he hadn't commit suicide, yet.

Whatever we tried, he kept holding on to Bella.

He wasn't interested in a job, in going to college, girls or whatever.

"Bella was, is , and will be the only one for me," he always said.

I walked upstairs to Avory's room.

There they lay. Asleep. My brother in the middle, his girls on both of his sides.

I felt the tears rolling down my face.

Besides the fact my brother, twin brother, had lost the love of his life, and that my two little, cute nieces had lost their amazing mommy, _I _had lost my best friend ever. Bella always had been there for me. She hadn't had the most easiest life herself, but she was so strong and determined…I got inspired by that, she gave me strength. We kept each other in balance.

I pulled the blankets more over the three lost souls, and all kissed them on their foreheads.

Renesmee and Avory had such of Bella in them. Renesmee had her eyes and lips, her stubbornness, her passion for reading, her shyness, her wisdom. Avory had her hair color, her impulsiveness, being a bad liar, and she was mature, too.

That was another reason Edward clung to Bella so much. He wanted that his daughters knew who their mother was.

Detailed version.

Surprisingly, Renesmee _did _remembered her Momma, as she called Bella. Her shampoo, her laugh, her presence(how she looked like, and all).

"Momma, I miss you."

I turned around, but the three of them were all deeply asleep.

Another thing Bella gave to her daughters: talking in the sleep.

Avory talked almost every night, Nessie only if she was stressed, afraid or sad. Like now.

"Momma, don't leave me."

I tore more apart. I closed the door, and walked downstairs, went straight to my room and dropped myself on the bed. I began to sob.

"Ali? Alice?"

I hadn't noticed that Jasper was out on the balcony.

He came in and enclosed me in his arms. "What is it, Alice?"

"It's just…well…it hurts me to see Edward. And the girls. Nessie was mumbling in her sleep. She said "Momma, I miss you," and "Momma, don't leave me". I don't think we even realize how really bad the three of them miss Bella."

"I know, Alice, I know."

"Do you think Bella's still alive?"

"I don't know. I don't think so, though."

"Me, too. But I still hope on it."

"I do, too, Al. We all do." He pulled me down, and covered us with the blankets.

**REview! And grizzly's up next.**


	4. Emmett: Broken

**Emmett time!**

**There are going to be - I think- ± four/five more chapters, and then the story is on its end. We have Renesmee, Honor, Bella and Edward POV's coming up.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer- Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!! Thanks _so _much for writing the Twilight Saga- owns it all. I just play around.**

_**EmPOV**_

After the worst day of our lives -the day Bella vanished out of our lives- it has never been the same. Never. Not even close.

We had lost a beloved one, someone who was like our own. Bella was like my sister. My clumsy sister. She was hilarious, and we were always joking with each other. She was our missing piece of the perfect puzzle. All the Cullens were finally paired up.

But I'd also lost my brother. My little brother, Eddie – don't call him like that when you're not substanded against being hit, though- Bella had made him whole. She had made him alive. His eyes were like fucking diamonds since he had met Bella. They were just meant to be.

And then they got little Nessie. And followed by Ave the pave. They were huge shocks, but wonderful ones. We really got closer as a family. With Bella's divorced parents, Charlie Sawn and Renée Dwyer, as well.

When Bella had vanished, Edward turned dead. His eyes became a dull green, instead of the sparkling Emerald it used to be. He wasn't looking well after himself, he didn't eat anything. He just was there, on his room.

We didn't know what to do, what to do to let him come out of his room.

A few days later, Esme couldn't handle it anymore, and walked up to his room. We could hear the yelling downstairs. Oh yeah, my mom knows how to overreact. She clearly passed it to my sister Alice.

"Edward Anthony Cullen! You're now going to get out of your room!"

Nothing.

"Edward Cullen, stop it! Does it make anything better? No! Do you get Bella back with this? No. Bella wouldn't want you to be like this. She would have wanted that you would take care of the girls. But mostly, of yourself. They need you, Edward. And you know you need them, too."

Eventually we heard a door croak open, and people descending the stairs. Esme entered the living room first, red eyes and cheeks of crying, followed by Edward.

All our jaws dropped by the sight of him. Never had we seen him like this. Not when he was totally lame. Not even people on TV. His eyes were red of all the crying, he had deep bags under his eyes, his face was clearly paler, his hair was one BIG mess, and he had a beard. Edward NEVER EVER had a beard before. He was also clearly thinner.

Renesmee and Avory looked shocked to their dad.

He walked up to Rosalie, who was holding Renesmee, and held out his hands for his daughter.

Rosalie hesitated. Always worried about the safety of children, of course.

Edward snapped. "Fucking hell, Rose, give me my daughter, now. NOW!" he roared.

We all shivered, and I wanted to stand up, to protect my angel. Avory started to cry in my father's arms.

Rosalie gave Edward Renesmee, eyes wide of shock and fear.

Avory had still been given breastfeeding by Bella. Carlisle was her personal doctor now, to see how she was doing.

"Carlisle, give me Avory."

Carlisle was the only person, besides Bella, who could reason with Edward. "Edward, son, this are your daughters. They live. Be careful with them. They're Bella's, too. Live. For Renesmee, for Avory. For Bella."

"Carlisle…" his voice broke. And Renesmee threw her arms around his neck, and placed her cheek against his. "I…I…can't. I can't live without…Bel-la…" his voice broke again on her name. "I can't, dad. I can't."

"You can, Edward. I know you can." And my father patted his shoulder. "Now, why aren't you going to make a memorial stone for her? Together with Renesmee. Avory is too young, boy."

He simply nodded.

They were busy all day. At noon he dropped Renesmee off for her noon sleep, and to get lunch. In the evening he entered the house again, grabbed the leftovers from dinner, and after he was finished, he told he was done.

We followed him to the beginning of the forest, where the cottage was were Bella and Edward had lived till her disappearing.

There it was. A memorable stone, in the form of a heart, with a picture of Bella. It was a very stunning stone. The lines said:

_Isabella Marie Swan,  
__Love, Momma, Bella, Bells  
__We'll be waiting for you. Always.  
__Your beloved ones_

Renesmee and he had planted some flowers next to it, and she had made a drawing which Edward had put into a frame, so it wouldn't be ruined by the weather.

"I love you, Bella," he whispered.

Alice and I both laid our arm around his shoulders.

"It's really beautiful, Edward," Alice said, and laid her head on his shoulder.

"Thanks, Alice."

I gave a squeeze in his shoulder.

He smiled to me. If you can call a move of the lips a smile. But compared to his face expressions these days, it could be called a smile.

"We will let you alone now, son," Carlisle said.

"Can I have Renesmee and Ave with me, please?"

That was the first time Edward called Renesmee Renesmee since her birth.

We all knew how important this was to Edward. So Rosalie and Jasper handed over Avory and Nessie.

He stayed away for three hours, before he called and said they would stay over at the cottage.

I know that everyday is a suffer for my little brother. I can see it.

Yes, he lightens all up when he's with his daughters again, but he will never be the same as he was with Bella.

If only Bella would stand on the threshold one day, returning in our lives.

**Okay, I've never had reviews for this story before, and I know not many people read this, but I would really appreciate a review.**

**Story news:  
- Looking for my Brother: I've finished it yesterday. I only need to be typed and edited, and then it will be ready to roll on FanFiction. There gonna be two more chapters, and then it's complete.  
- Dating Fame: I'm very busy with chapter 13. I expect to go up this weekend, but I can't promise that.  
- Sun, BFF's and Love in LA: Busy with chapter 13 as well. I'm not content, yet, and it isn't finished. Somewhere along next week I expect a new chapter.**


	5. Renesmee: Incomplete

**Renesmee time!**

**It's a very, very short one. Next one is Honor's, and that's a long one. I have now written 7 more chapters, planning to write 3 more. **

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns it all. I just play around, as always.**

**Big thanks to Adam Young, a.k.a. Owl City, for his amazing music. It helps me a lot.**

_RenPOV_

My name is Renesmee Carlie Cullen. My Momma picked out my name, and I'm very proud of it. I'm four years old, but I'm turning five in two months, three days before my Momma's birthday. My Momma disappeard when I was almost two. She had had a mysterious accident. I miss her everyday.

My aunties always tell me how she used to brush my hair, how she played with me, feeded me, swam with me.

I don't remember my Momma really well. I _do _remember her shampoo, how she always used to smell when she had just showered. Like strawberries. Daddy washes our hair with it, now, too. I slightly remember how she looked like. Very beautiful at least. If you let me hear my Mommy's voice, I would recognize it. My little sister, Avory, reacts on it, too.

I'm really worried about my Daddy, actually.

He loved my mommy soooo much. Now his heart is broken. I can see the sadness in his eyes. I can see the tears on his face, before he whips them rapidly away.

He tries really hard, though.

That's why my Daddy is the best Daddy in the world.

My Daddy has lost the love of his life, his joy, the reason of his living. He stayed behind alone. He could have left or go to heaven, but he stayed. Daddy stayed for us. He would give up everything for his daughters, my younger sister Avory and myself. He's with us everyday. He almost never leaves us without him. He doesn't have a job. Well, he looks after us, but not a job like grandpa Charlie or grandpa Carlisle.

I know he still thinks and hopes that Bella, my Momma, is still alive somewhere, and that she will come back one day.

I hope that, too.

**Short, huh?**

**I tried to write in a kid's way, not too difficult words and sentences. With going to heaven, Renesmee means die. That Edward didn't kill himself - and would go to heaven- but stayed with them, for them.**

**Play list:**

**~ Joanna Newsom – Peach, Plum, Pear  
~ Owl City - Vanilla Twilight  
~ Owl City - Fuzzy Blue Lights.**


	6. Honor Rose: Miracle

**Honor Rose is up! Maybe this chapter is a little too long, but I just couldn't cut it.**

_HRPOV_

It is July. That means, besides that I had my birthday on the 3rd, we will enter the two most saddest months of the year.(With 'we' I mean my family and myself)

Three years ago, in the mid of July, Bella disappeared. Suddenly.

She'd had an accident. But her body hasn't been found. Not even a piece. Which is strange. That must mean her body has been removed.

It turned Edward into a death person. He hadn't only lost the love of his life, his other half, and the mother of his two little miracles, no he also held himself responsible for it. Bella was on the phone with him, while she was driving and got the accident. He said that if hadn't called – he had been worried about where she stayed- she wouldn't have had the accident.

Of course, it wasn't his fault.

But whatever we said, whatever we tried, it wouldn't help. My brother had already kept himself responsible for everything in his entire life, that this wasn't an exception.

It tore us, as his family, apart to see him suffer, to see him try, to see him put on a good smile for his two girls.

On the black date, Edward always goes to Bella's memorial. He stays there all day. He talks to her, lies on the grass, sings to her, reads to her…In the evening he comes to get their daughters, and we visit, too.

From that date on, he stays in his mourning till the end of September.

On August 13 Bella and Edward would have tied the knot.

Bella had finally given in that year. She had actually wanted to wait another year, till Avory was one-and-a-half, but Edward had won the reason.

She would get something back, something she really wanted. What it was? We don't know.

Only Bella and Edward know.

That day had to be the best day of my brother's life.

He would finally marry Bella, the woman who made him whole, who completed him, who had given birth to his two little sunshines. Bella would finally be officially his. And he would officially be hers. His dream would come true.

It never could happen.

In September he would be on his best and celebrate his oldest daughter's, Renesmee, birthday on September 10th.

A day after was 9/11. My Dad had lost two friends on that day, so it was sober too. On September 13, Edward would spend the entire day at her memorial, too. It was Bella's birthday.

Every year, Edward got torn more apart. He came over it in the months after, but then it all started again.

Today, Edward was with his daughters out on First Beach.

My father called everyone to the dining room to talk.

"So, July 16 is coming closer and closer. I think it's good for Edward to do something else than look after Nessie and Ave and mourn. He needs to have fun, and no worries."

"Oh, Jazz and I can take care of that," Emmett, my oldest brother, commented.

"Yeah, and Alice, Rose, and I can take the girls to Seattle, or something. Go shopping, and I can take them to a playground while Alice and Rosalie have some alone time to shop for baby clothes," I proposed.

"Oh, that will be amazing honey. I will stay at home, and will cook a delicious dinner," Esme, my Mom, said.

"Everyone agrees?" my Dad asked.

We all nodded.

"When?" Alice, my sister and Edward's twin, asked.

"July 16," Carlisle said, matter-of-factly.

"But that is…" I protested.

"I know sweetie, I know. And that is exactly the reason. Do you think Bella wants him to be like this? It would crash her. She would have wanted Edward to have fun, that her girls would have fun. Renesmee and Avory aren't stupid. They see how much Edward suffers. Everyone needs a day without having to worry. He can go to the memorial after dinner."

And that's how it happened.

Edward had been reasoning for hours, but he couldn't win of Renesmee and Avory. When they had heard of the plan, they ran to him and said "Please, Daddy? I wanna go to the playground. And I wanna go shopping with aunties Alice, Rosalie and Honor. Please?"

"Yeah, please Daddy?" Avory fell in.

Edward groaned, he couldn't say no to his girls. "Okay."

"Yes! Thank you Daddy!" they beamed and both hugged him. "Are you gonna have fun with grandpa Carlisle and uncles Emmett and Jasper, then?"

"Yes."

"That's good." Renesmee kissed his cheek.

Edward had one condition. We had to have our phones on, so he could call us whenever he wanted. He had always gone a little crazy when Bella was away, and now when Bella wasn't around anymore, he was that with his daughters.

We agreed, of course.

But what Edward didn't know, was the fact that Emmett and Jasper didn't allow any cell phones on the trip. Edward had to have a day of fun and no-worries.

At the moment I was currently having breakfast with my two cute little nieces, in our pajamas.

Edward entered the kitchen and kissed his daughters goodbye on their forehead.

"Be nice for your aunties, okay?" He looked them straight in the eye.

They nodded. "Yes, Daddy."

He hugged them close.

"Thanks, Honor. Take good care of them," and he kissed me on my forehead as well.

"I will, Edward."

"Edward Anthony Cullen! Hurry up dude and get your lazy ass over here!" we heard someone yelling. Emmett.

Renesmee and Avory giggled, and with a sigh Edward left.

"So, when are we going?"

"Well, first we have to finish our breakfast," I told them. "Then we have to brush our teeth, dress up. And we have to wait for auntie Alice and auntie Rosalie."

"Why?"

"Because they aren't awake yet. Auntie Rosalie is having a baby, and that is very exhausting. She has to rest a lot. Maybe auntie Alice is already up, but she always takes her time in her closet and bathroom."

The girls smiled.

When we had finished, they helped me with cleaning up and put their own plate in the dishing machine, washed their hands and waited for me.

"What do we have to wear auntie Honor?"

"Easy going clothes. No skirts or dresses. Pants or leggings are okay. You could wear a dress over a legging, but it has to be a comfortable one. And good shoes, sneakers. Which may become dirty. Your Converse or Vans by example. And a sweater, for if it gets cold. Well, just pick clothes you feel comfortable and can play in. I'm gonna get dressed, and then I will check on you, okay? Don't go downstairs before I've come to your room."

"Okay," and they sprinted to the stairs.

"Don't run on the stairs ladies," I called after them.

Myself, I put on a pair of Genetic Denim jeans, my favorite Vans – black Eras- a sand yellow t-shirt with Little Miss Shy (I'd gotten it from Emmett, who had found it the perfect shirt for me. Which is true, I'm very shy), and a black sweater with hood and zipper.

I walked up to the rooms of my nieces and knocked on Renesmee's door.

"C'mon in."

Renesmee was still in her pajamas.

"I can't choose auntie Honor," she said, a little embarrassed. Just as Bella. Whenver we had an event or something, her whole room would be covered with clothes and shoes.

I bent down. "Okay, let's see. We will start with your pants. Do you want to wear a legging with a dress, a legging with shorts, or just a pair of jeans?"

"Pair of jeans."

"Okay dokay." I walked into her closet. Yes, closet yes. Alice had persisted on the girls having a walk-in closet. I picked a pair of jeans and showed it to Renesmee. "What about this one?"

She smiled and grabbed it out of my hands.

I picked some socks and looked to her shoes. Renesmee had an enormous shoe collection. I decided to go for some cute pair of Vans slip-ons. "Here, put these on. Is the jeans good?"

"Yup."

"Good." I walked over to her shirts, and choose a grey one and a dark blue sweater. "Here you go. You agree?"

"Yeah. Thanks, auntie Honor." And she hugged me.

I smiled. "My pleasure. I'm gonna check on Avory. When you're ready, you may go downstairs. Maybe Alice or Rosalie wants to do your hair."

"Okay."

Avory was different than her sister. She had already picked her entire outfit. But the thing with Avory was that this three-year old went over the top most of the times.

"Avory, we're going on a shopping spree and play on a playground. Not to a dress-up party."

"Oh."

"Here, let me help you."

"I wanna wear this legging," she said and pointed to a grey legging. "And this white t-shirt with this pants, plus my Adidas sneakers. For a sweater I want to wear my dark grey Diesel."

"Sure, Avory Elizabeth," I chuckled.

Gosh, Avory really was one of a kind.

We walked downstairs and before we had even knocked on Alice' door, she said "C'mon girls, clothes check."

Rosalie was on the bed, while Alice was doing Renesmee's hair. "Well, Honor you did a great job. With the three of you," Alice praised me, and turned to Avory. "Ave, sweetie, you can wait on the bed. Auntie Alice is almost finished with this young lady."

* * *

First, we went to this huge mall in downtown Seattle. We spent there two hours, before the girls wanted to go to a playground. Alice and I stuffed the things we had bought so far in the car. After that, I went to the playground with Renesmee and Avy, while Alice and Rosalie continued the shopping spree.

I was sitting on the edge of the playground, watching my nieces, when they suddenly stopped with climbing and ran up to a woman. And hugged her.

"Oh, great," I muttered, and walked over to the girls. While I was walking, I apologized to the woman. "I'm sorry, miss. Really. I hope they didn't hurt you or something." Then I spoke to my two nieces. "Renesmee and Avory Cullen, come here and say sorry to this woman."

When they didn't listen, I called their nicknames. "Nessie! Ave!"

It was when I called Renesmee's nickname, that the woman's head shot up.

And I froze.

I understood why Renesmee and Avory had ran up to this woman, why this woman hadn't complained.

It was Bella. For God's sake.

Or she had to have a look-a-like, what I doubted with all what I had in me.

"Bella?" I was able to choke out.

She nodded.

I took her in a hug and started to sob. "What happened? How does it come that you're alive? Where have you been? Oh gosh, we've missed you so much. And Edward, oh Edward, he has suffered so much."

She looked confused.

Now I was doubting. What if this wasn't _our _Bella? Bella isn't a really special name, and Renesmee and Avory could have been mistaken. They were so little when their mother vanished. "You are Bella, right? Bella Swan? Tell me about you?" I asked, desperately wanting to hear her story.

'Bella' nodded and blushed. She cleared her throat. "The first thing I remember was me lying in a hospital, in San Francisco I've been told. I had been in an accident with my car. A helicopter could have come really soon and I was flown to a hospital in Seattle, followed by one in Portland, and last to San Francisco. Why? I don't know. Where it happened? I don't know. A couple took care of me, because I was confused and had lost my memory. The memory of the fist twenty years of my life. But I hadn't lost _everything. _Whenever I closed my eyes, I could see images…visions. And I knew it was _me _who I saw, the person I looked through the eyes of. I saw myself on a beach as a little girl together with my Dad, the house of my mother – which I later found out was in Phoenix, but she doesn't live there anymore. I saw my high school in Forks, which I found out later as well, and the time I had morning sickness and had to throw up a thousand times…when I was being embarrassed for being pregnant, the birth of my first daughter, the proposal, the birth of my second daughter…"

W-o-w. This was Bella.

I had to call Alice.

And Edward. Damn, he didn't have his cell with him.

"Do you remember names?" I asked, while I was looking for my cell in my bag.

"Yeah. I remembered my first name, Isabella, and that I preferred to be called Bella. I remember the name Nessie, and through my dreams I found out the name of the person I love, Edward. And a date. August 13."

I choked. Holy fucking what? Do you need more proof, Honor? This. Is. Bella. Swan. Bella, the love of your brother, the mother of your nieces. Stop. Doubting!

"Are you okay?" she asked me, concerned.

I pulled myself together again. "Yeah," I said. "Could you watch these two here?" I asked, motioning to Renesmee and Avory, who had been quiet during our conversation.

"Sure."

"Girls, why don't you say her who you are?"

"But she already knows us. She's our Mommy," Avory whined.

"Still do."

I pulled out my cell and dialed Alice' number, walking off for some feet.

"Hello?"

"Hi Alice, it's me, Honor Rose…"

"Honor? Did something happen with the girls?"

"No, no, no." I realized my voice sounded upset. "There's nothing _wrong_. Alice, you never guess who we ran into." There was only one person I could mean with that.

Alice gasped. I heard Rosalie asking her what was going on. "Really? Bella?"

"Yes. Renesmee and Avory noticed her and ran up to her. They even hugged her, Al. I walked over and apologized, but then I saw who it was. It was her, Alice. I swear. She reacted on the name Nessie, too, she recognized the girls. She just has lost a huge part of her memory."

"Oh my gosh," Alice exclaimed. And I heard her starting to sob. "I will tell Rose. Will you call Mom? Edward doesn't have his cell with me, does he?"

"Nope."

"Perfect," she sighed. "Eh…Rose and I just spotted this amazing store. Ask Mom if she wants to pick you guys up, 'kay? We will also have more space for our new stuff on that way. And take Bella with you, of course."

"Okay." God, I loved my sister. She always knew what to do. "Thanks, Al."

"My pleasure, Honny," she laughed.

I hang up and stuffed my phone in my pocket.

Bella was pushing her daughters on the swings.

"Thanks Bella."

She smiled.

"So, ladies, have you already proposed yourself to Bella?"

They shook their heads.

Guess I have to do it. "Well, Bella, this young lady here, with the bronze hair and chocolate brown eyes is Renesmee Carlie Cullen. She's turning five in two months. Everyone calls her Nessie, with the exception of my brother, her father…"

The two smiled to each other.

"You're lovely, Nessie."

"Thank you, Momma."

"And the other lady is Avory Elizabeth Cullen, the one with the mahony caramel brown hair and the Emerald green eyes. She's three-and-a-half. They're sisters, as you maybe already had noticed." I bit on my lip, and ran a hand through my hair. Don't be such a pussy, Honor. "But, eh, would you like to come have dinner at our house? It's near Forks. We live there with the entire family; my parents, my brother Emmett and his pregnant wife Rosalie, Edward, his little girls here, my sister Alice and her husband Jasper, and I. You wanna come?"

"Yeah, please, please? You wanna come? Come home?" Renesmee and Avory pouted.

Bella laughed.

And Renesmee's eyes widened. One of the few, very few things Renesmee could remember of her Momma, was her laugh.

Renesmee knew there had happened something strange to her mommy. She knew that Bella hadn't left on purpose. And now, when Bella didn't respond on some things, little, wise four year old Renesmee realized that Momma was a little bit sick. I saw the little girl whipping away a tear.

"I would love to," Bella answered.

I smiled. "Okay, I will call my Mom to pick us up. Hold on." I grabbed my phone again and dialed my Mom's cell.

"Hey sweetie." Number recognizing of course.

"Hi Mom. Could you do me a favor, and pick us up?"

"Why? Aren't you going together with Ali and Rosalie?"

"Nope. They haven't finished their shopping spree, yet. Plus Ness and Ave are ready to go home. And Mom, we ran into someone…"

My tone told my Mom exactly who I meant. I heard her gasp, just as Alice had done. "Bella?" she choked out. "You guys ran into _Bella_?"

"Yes Mom, we did. But her brain has been damaged. She can't remember tons of the first twenty years of her life."

"How terrible!" Esme exclaimed. "Okay, where are you?"

I told her the address and while we waited, we went to a local supermarket to grab some sandwiches and ice-cream.

The girls were arguing about what was the most delicious ice-cream flavor.

"Cookie crunch," Renesmee said determined.

"Ah ah, strawberries is the best," Avory argued.

It went on till they both had grabbed their favorite ice-cream.

"Are they always like this?" Bella asked me.

"No, they're very sweet and caring for each other and really can count on one the other. They have been through a lot, they lost their mother three years ago." You. They have lost you.

"Oh no. How?"

"A mysterious car accident. Her body hasn't been found, which is strange. She just vanished. It has broken my brother apart. He hasn't been the same since." Should I tell her I was talking about her?

Well, I didn't have to do that, because Avory came running up to us. "Mommy, Mommy, may we have Loops? Please Mommy?" she looked up to Bella, with a box of Kellog's Loops in her small hands.

Bella shot me a confused look, but bent down and stroked Avory's head. "Yes. But only if Renesmee agrees. Okay?"

"Thanks Mommy." And little Ave gave her Mommy a hug. She stormed off and you could hear her yelling in the entire supermarket. "Nessie! Nessie! You wanna have Loops, too?"

We grabbed some other stuff Esme had asked us to buy and went to look for the girls.

"I am really their Mom, aren't I?" Bella suddenly asked me, in almost a whisper. She had been quiet since Avory had left.

I swallowed. "Yes," I told her. "Renesmee calls you Momma, while Avory uses Mommy." I always ramble when I'm nervous, you see. "Bella, I don't know what happened, no-one knows, but we will work it out. All of us. We've missed you so much…Today is the third 'anniversairy' of your disappearing," I swallowed again.

"Really?"

"Yeah, July 16."

"What is it with August 13? I don't know what it is with that date, but it keeps shouting at me."

"You have an idea?"

"I know it had to be the most beautiful day of my life. Maybe my wedding? I have been engaged after all."

I nodded to let her know she was right.

"What happened to my engagement ring?"

"Edward still has it. You had put it off that day, because you would help a friend in Olympia with moving and painting. You was afraid it would broke or get dirty. Clumsiness," I explained.

"That sounds like me."

I gave her a small smile, and looked on my watch. "We should get the girls. Esme, my mother, can be here every minute."

Not long after we had returned to the playground, Esme Cullen pulled my brother's silver Volvo in the parking lot. That was the only car with the girls' car seats.

She rapidly stepped out and walked over to us. Without words, she took Bella in a hug.

"I've missed you so much, sweetheart. Life was so dark without you. And Edward, my dear boy, he missed you the most of all. It was so hard to see him like that," she muttered with her face in Bella's hair. "Oh gosh, I'm happy you're here, darling."

"Mommy has to sit with us, Mommy has to sit with us!" Avory bounced. She was very good in repeating.

The sisters ran up to the car. Bella and Esme put them in their car seats and buckled their belts.

_**Play list:**_

_# Thom Yorke – Harrowdown Hill  
# Owl City – Fireflies  
__# Thriving Ivory - Runaway  
__# Thriving Ivory – Stranger  
__# Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Down Boy_

**Alright, that was it. I know it's not that good. Sorry. Next one is Bel-la again.**

**And I'm so sorry for my lack of updates. _BUT _chapter 13 of Sun, BFF's and Love in LA is finished, and I'm waiting for it to beta'd. Sadly Dating Fame is something different. I just can't get it right, and I'm sorry to say it may take a little longer than planned. Once again, sorry.**

**Thank you to _SmokeyMelina, teambellaedward & flock6 _for reviewing. Means the world to me.**

**Hope you review. :)**


	7. Bella: Home

_BPOV_

Finding my little girls hadn't been just a thought.

I had written down all the things I could remember and I had called the hospital if they had information about me. I went to do research, check things. I found out I'd lived in Phoenix for many years, and that I'd graduated from Forks High School five years ago.

This morning I'd arrived at Sea-Tac Airport. I would stay in Seattle for two days before I would go to Forks.

I was walking to a local supermarket when I saw two girls running up to me. Strangers, yet familiar.

"Mommy! Mommy!"

It immediately hit me. My girls. _My _girls.

They circled their arms around me and I bent down to enclose them in my arms.

I hadn't noticed that a young woman had approached us till she spoke. She was apologizing. For what? I'd finally found my girls! Or well, actually _they _had found _me_.

Then she mentioned the name Nessie. I knew that name. As a reflex, my head shoot up.

And I was looking to a bronze haired, blue-grey eyed young woman. She remembered me of the male I'd seen in my 'dreams'. She was shocked, for sure, to see me.

* * *

After we had done groceries, the girls had gotten their ice-cream and Loops, we waited at the playground for the woman called Esme, supposed to be Honor's mother and the grammy of my girls. All the names sounded so familiar to me, but I couldn't get to it.

A silver shining Volvo drove into our direction. A woman ran out of it, her caramel brown hair waving in the wind. And again, oh so familiar, but still unknown.

I guessed this was Esme Cullen.

She took me in a fierce hug. "I've missed you so much, sweetheart. Life was so dark without you. And Edward, my dear boy, he missed you the most of all. It was so hard to see him like that," she muttered with her face in Bella's hair. "Oh gosh, I'm happy you're here, darling," she sobbed. "Let's go home."

Home.

Avory jumped up and down and said I had to sit with them.

Esme and I put them in their seats and I sandwiched myself between them.

I actually wanted to talk with my – as it seems – mother- and sister-in-law, but my daughters thought otherwise. They played with my hair, told me jokes and Renesmee told me about everything she could remember of her life.

I was stunned by her.

I had met much older kids, who were not even as smart as this four year old. My four year old.

We arrived at an empty house.

The girls showed me around. They dragged me to their rooms and eventually to the room of their Daddy. And Mommy.

My room. This had been _my _room for years.

When I entered the room, I started to cry.

"Nessie, Avy, why don't you let your Mommy alone for some time?" someone proposed.

I turned around to see a small, pixie woman standing in the doorway. She wore a jegging, a white funky Jimmy Eat World t-shirt, low-top All Stars, leather jacket and had a pair of Ray-Ban sunglasses in her hand. She had cried, too.

"Okay auntie Alice. We will go help grammy with cooking." And they left.

Just as Esme had done, she took me in an embrace as well. "Finally, Bella. Finally," she muttered.

I smiled to her.

"Do you remember me?"

I thought, deeply.

Alice chuckled. "Have you seen Avory in deep thoughts? It's the spitting image of you."

I thought again. "Vaguely," I said eventually. "Your voice more than your presence."

"Good," she smiled, glad I did remember her somehow. She took my hand and looked me square in the eye. "We will help you with getting back your lost life. My Dad's a doctor. He knows the best medical treatments, doctors and hospitals. You will be okay."

"Thanks. Where is…" I swallowed. I had missed him, so badly. I had been so disappointed when I realized _he _wasn't here. I needed to see him. "Where is Edward?"

Alice' face lit up, and she laughed. "I'm so happy you ask _that _question. Edward will like that, too," she laughed. "You do remember _him_, don't you? Couldn't expect something else. He has been with you every minute of both your pregnancies. If you have seen yourself being pregnant, you probably saw him as well. But to answer your question, Edward is away with Carlisle, my Dad, Emmett, my other brother, and Jasper, my husband. It's the third 'anniversary' of your vanishing, you know. My Dad thought Edward needed to have fun today. I don't know when he will come back, but before dinner. Don't worry, Bella. He will be utterly safe," she smiled encouraging.

"I know, I know." I felt so stupid. But I really _did _worry.

"C'mon, I wanna show you something." She took me downstairs, outside and let me to the edge of the forest. I could vaguely see a cottage in the shadow of the trees.

"That's where Edward, you, Nessie and Ave used to spent a lot of time. Before you disappeared."

"Wow."

"I know, but I actually wanted to show you something else." Alice brought me to a spot, full of beautiful flowers. When we came closer I could see it was something like a memorial, a memorial stone included. The stone was in the shape of a heart.

Alice stopped right in front of it and sat down on the ground. I followed.

It was me. it was me, who's photo was on the stone.

Over my picture, in a breathtaking writing, was written:

_Isabella Marie Swan  
__Love, Momma, Bella, Bells  
__We'll be waiting for you  
__Your beloved ones_

It was beautiful, so beautiful. I felt the tears dripping out of my eyes.

Alice took my hand. "You don't want to know what you left behind. A broken family. Two little girls. But most of all, you left behind my brother. I'm so, so happy you're back. It was the only medicine to 'heal' Edward. He has made this all," she gestured to the memorial.

"Wow," I said again, not knowing what I had to say otherwise.

"Yeah, together with Nessie."

I rested my head on her shoulder. "I'm happy I'm finally back, too. It was horrible, living in the dark, but knowing you had two daughters somewhere, a man who you loved with all you had, a family, parents, friends. I didn't know if you were dead or alive, I didn't know where I had to look. But step for step I found the chips of the puzzle of my life."

We sat there for what seemed like hours.

"Are you ready to go back? I think dinner will be up soon. Which means the boys can be here every minute."

"Yes."

We did a run to the house. Of course, I tripped a couple of times.

The boys weren't home. Yet.

Relax, Bella. Don't worry. He will come around soon. You will see Edward in just a split-second.

When we were washing our hands, Renesmee and Avory ran into the kitchen.

"Momma, your jeans are dirty. Did you fall?" my oldest daughter asked me, concerned.

I bent down and stroked her beautiful bronze hair. "Yes, baby, but I'm okay. You know how clumsy Momma can be."

My angel chuckled.

I quickly changed into other clothes, borrowed from Esme, since my stuff was still in my hotel. And at 'home'. Well, in the house I used to live before I took off to Seattle. This was my home now.

I was having a bowl with healthy snacks in my hands, to eat in front of the TV with the girls, when the door opened.

Two men stumbled in. Another man soon followed. I vaguely heard other sounds like slamming of car doors and laughing coming out of the dark.

The first man was huge and had dark hair, the second was a honey blonde, and the last was golden blonde.

They were all laughing.

"Look who we ran into! Tanya!" the huge one exclaimed.

Tanya…Tanya…Tanya. What was it with that name? For some kind of reason, I felt nauseas by hearing that name. I had partly hidden myself behind a wall.

"Hey guys. Tanya? Well, I don't see her. But you can never guess who _we_ ran into," Alice beamed.

Then two others stumbled in. A strawberry blonde woman, who had her arm around a bronze haired man.

I recognized him immediately.

Edward.

My Edward.

And I felt the bowl slipping out of my hands, falling on the hard marble. It broke, of course. And everyone turned their heads into my direction.

I felt a blush starting to rise on my cheeks, neck and entire face.

Renesmee and Avory, who had heard the guys coming home, sprinted in the hall way, but stopped when they saw the glass.

"I'm sorry," I stuttered and stove upstairs. I didn't know where I was going. I hadn't had a room, and I felt an intruder when I would go to Edward's room.

But I didn't know where I had to go elsewhere, so I went to his room.

I sobbed and hid my face in my hands.

How could I've been so stupid?! Of course, someone as handsome as Edward would have female attention all the time. It had been three years since I disappeared. How could I've expected he would be waiting for me?

Because he did. I knew that. And Esme and Alice had told me so. Edward _had_ waited for me.

He still loved me.

But I still felt jealous when I pictured that woman with him.

I was disturbed by hearing someone climbing up the stairs, and some time later a knock. "May I come in?"

It wasn't the velvet voice of Edward for sure.

The man with the golden hair came to sit next to me.

I sniffled and whipped away my tears.

"You must be Carlisle, right?" I guessed.

"Yes. The patriarch of this weird but very close family. I heard you've walked into my granddaughters and youngest daughter this noon…"

"Yeah. Well, actually, Renesmee and Avory walked into _me_."

He laughed. "This is probably the best day of our life, after the past three years."

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"Having done this to you, to your family."

"Bella, your accident was just an accident. It's no-one's fault. And besides, you're here now. That's all what matters, right now," he soothed me. "But, if you don't mind, I want to talk with you. It doesn't have to be now or anytime soon. About your memory. I need to talk with the doctors from the hospitals you're treated in, and I have to set up a program to get your memory back somehow. It will be a lot of hospital visits this year, but I know you're pretty used to hospitals…" he laughed.

I joined in with his laughter.

"But don't worry about that. Now, tell me why were you sitting here all alone?"

Why? Because I saw my Edward with another woman, I had dropped the bowl, and I was embarrassed.

"Come on, downstairs. We're all dying to be and talk with you, Bella."

Okay Bella, you can do this. I pulled myself together and nodded.

He helped me up and together we descended the stairs.

As soon as they heard us on the stairs, they came out of the living room. Edward in front.

He took me in an embrace and I had my second déjà vu today.

But this embrace was different from the others.

Now I finally was home.

In Edward's arms, where I belonged.

_**Play list:**_

_& Lou Reed – Satellite of Love  
__& INXS – Don't Change  
__& David Bowie – Modern Love  
__& Yeah Yeah Yeahs – 10x10  
__& The Verve – Bitter Sweet Symphony  
__& White Rabbits – Percussion Gun_

**I know it's all not that special and all, and that the reunion of Edward and Bella isn't that spectacular. But more will come. I can tell ya that Sun, BFF's and Love in LA will be up in just a short time. **

**Edward is next, people!**

**Thank you _xXxIggyxXx _for your sweet review. Everyone who subbed or alerted, big hugs and kisses. :)**


	8. Edward: Alive

**_Rest in Peace Alexander McQueen_**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight Saga, I own my imagination.**

**Thanks for your reviews! :D**

**_EPOV_**

Bella.

Bella was here. Just a few feet away from me. My Bella.

I saw her shocked expression, which must have been the same as my own.

Then everything happened really fast. She dropped the bowl, muttered "I'm sorry," and disappeared.

I wanted to run after her, but my father stopped me. "Not now, Edward. You will get your time."

I growled and released myself of Tanya's arm – how the hell had it come there? – and I ran outside. I could see my wall. Would be Bella be there right now?

Suddenly, I felt a small hand on my shoulder. I looked to my left and saw Renesme squatted next to me. Avory came up on my right.

"She's back huh, Daddy? Finally."

"Yeah, finally."

"Who was that blonde woman?" Avory asked. Always the curious one.

"An old family friend."

"Oh." Avory's lips formed a small 'o'.

I chuckled. "So since I may not talk to your Mommy, could you please tell me how you ran into Bella?"

"Well…" Avory began.

"No, Ave, I'm gonna tell," Renesmee interrupted.

Avory pouted but couldn't win of her big sister.

"We were at the playground with auntie Honor, when we saw a woman who looked so much like Momma. Whn she came closer, we realized it _was_ Momma. So we ran up to her and hugged her. But Momma is not entirely okay. Auntie Alice told us Momma's head hasbeen hit really hard, and that she has lost many memories. That's why she never came. She couldn't remember us, and she didn't know who and where we were."

I simply nodded. It hurt me that Bella had lost her memory. But I had her back and she was alive, that's what matters to me now. "It's getting chilly, we should go back in," I said and stood up. I grabbed the small hands of my girls and we walked back in.

Soon after we had come back in, we heard footsteps on the stairs. I hastily stood up and walked, more ran actually, to the staircase.

There she was, again. Bella. My Bella.

As soon as she had placed her feet on the floor, I took her in a hug.

I sniffled up her smell. I had missed this so much. Having Bella in my arms.

We didn't need words to express our feelings, our pain, our missing.

"I love you, Edward," Bella whispered and it felt as if my chest would explode of happiness. "Always have. Even I didn't know you, I loved you. I'm blessed with you. As my other half and soul mate, as the Daddy of my two little girls." She kissed my throat.

I kissed her hair. "I could say the same about you, Bella."

"That memorial is dashing, Edward."

I smiled. And felt her heartbeat sped up against my chest. I laughed.

"Edward!"

"Why don't we put our daughters in bed, together. It's getting pretty late."

"I would love to," she smile up to me.

"Renesmee, Avory, bedtime."

They hopped off the bench they had sat on and pulled out their arms for us to pick them up. Bella took Renesmee and I took Avory. I circled my free arm around Bella.

"You're coming downstairs later?" Alice asked, even I was sure she already knew the answer.

"No."

"Okay, we will talk in the morning then."

We all wormed us in Bella and mine bed, and Bella read _Alice in Wonderland_.

Renesmee, Avory, and I too, had closed our eyes in pure happiness and listened to her beautiful voice. The voice of my fiancée, my love, my almost everything. Mine. Bella.

I was disturbed by Bella clearing her throat. "Eh, Edward, they're asleep. Shall we put tehm in their beds?"

I opened my eyes and smiled. "Of course."

We laid our little, sleeping girls in bed, kissed their foreheads and walked back to our room.

As soon as we had entered, I closed the door and attacked Bella's mouth. I ripper her blouse off and my hands went over her body, exploring what they had missed for so long.

Bella was tucking on my button down.

Suddenly she let go of my mouth and slightly pulled away. "Eh, Edward, are you sure nobody can see us?" she asked, embarrassed and a blush on her cheeks, glancing towards the glass walls.

I laughed and pulled her back to me. No. Nobody ever comes here."

That was enough for Bella, because she was leading me to the bed.

I softly pushed her down.

_**LEMON LEMONADE LEMON LEMONADE LEMON LEMONADE LEMON **__*grinning*_

**I know I'm fucking nasty over here, but I didn't want to ruin this by writing a bad lemon. I just can't express it with words. ****Let your imagination the free way and come up with it yourself. **

**Play list :  
! Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Soft Shock  
! Björk – All is Full of Love  
! Thriving Ivory – For Heaven's Sake  
! The Doors – Hello, I Love You  
! José González – Heartbeats  
! Cartel – I Will Hide Myself Away**


	9. Jasper: Surprise

**_BAFTAs Day  
Go check out Robert and Kristen tonight everyone!  
I don't know how it is in other countries, but here in the Netherlands I can see it on BBC 1.  
_****_Starts around 10 PM Dutch time._**

**_Happy Birthday Ashley Greene!  
Your Alice rocks and rules._**

**Since I already had this chapter up, why not being nice? **

**It's Jazzy pazzy time! I'm quite content with this chapter, hope you like it too.**

**Oh, and I think you should really check out the new 'Eclipse' stills, if you haven't already done that. My God, that promises some good Bella+Edward hotness. :D**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns it all, I just play around.**

**And it's hard to stick with the one word titles, but I try my best.**

**Thank you for the reviews I've gotten, especially of _Kikijay83_. So sweet and god, you almost made me cry. Thanks so much.**

**_JPOV_**

It was great to see Edward happy again after all those years.

I knew it wasn't the same as he had been with Bella, but at least the poor boy smiled. Really smiled. Not just a move of the lips. He laughed.

Em and I knew death well we must not get our hopes up, but well Edward just needed some distraction.

I mean, the guy is freaking twenty-four and is a full time Daddy.

That's not normal!

Okay, I've been together with Alice since forever, and never cheated on her, but I at least have had some fun at college.

My degree is journalism. I would love to become an interviewer or to get an own TV show like Dave L, Ellen DeG, Jimmy F or Jimmy K. Even a show as Oprah heart Obama would already be awesome!

Seriously, it was just coincidence Em, Edward, Carlisle and I ran into Tanya. Although I must admit Emmett and I knew she was living there somewhere.

Tanya Walker always has had it big for Edward. No denying needed. She had accepted he didn't see anything in her, but it's known she still hoped for that day he would beg for her forgiveness and would say he loved her.

We had invited her home, knowing the girls would be pleased to chat up with Tanya.

But we never had expected, hoped, dreamed of the sight we got to see when we came home.

At first I didn't see her. Not until Tanya and Edward, arms around each other, had stumbled in and I heard the sound of breaking glass.

There she stood, in all her glory. She hadn't changed at all these past three years.

Bella. Bella Swan.

Oh. My. God.

Surprise of the year. No, of the century. No, no, surprise of the world. Surprise of the humanity, the whatever.

This was a dream. A hallucination.

I hadn't taken drugs. Right?

After the bowl dropped, everything passed really fast. She muttered and disappeared before anyone could say or do anything.

Edward was the first to move, clearly wanting to run after her. But CC – as Em, Rose, Al, Ed the ped, Honny and I used to call Carlisle, the patriarch of the family, when we're in a weird mood – stopped him.

It seemed as if Edward realized then and there how intertwined Tanya and he were, and he looked as if he didn't have a clue how that had happened.

Edward being Edward, he ran off outside.

We were all still frozen to the ground and glanced nervously to each other.

Renesmee and Avory – the speed of reacting must be inherited or something – were the ones who broke the ice. They ran off, too, to their Daddy, and Carlisle went upstairs to talk with Bella.

The rest of us went to the living room, Esme grabbing some drink and snacks.

"How could this happen?" Emmett wondered out loud.

All of our eyes shot to him.

He blushed. Emmett freaking Cullen blushed. "I mean, we all thought she was dead. And now she's here…"

Rosalie chuckled and placed both of her hands on his. "Em, just be happy she's _not _dead, and that she's still Bella."

He smiled to her and kissed her.

As a reflex, I looked down at Alice, who had laid her head against my chest and had propped herself up.

She was my life.

It has been horrible to see Edward suffer so much. Not only because I totally understood him and felt with him, his pain brought Alice pain too, which gave me pain as well.

I have always been prone to emotions. I knew when I had to make jokes, or when I had to be a support or a helping hand.

My own father had been in the U.S. Army and was sent off very often. My younger sisters, Reign and Lucy, and I hardly saw him.

To make things bad, my Mom got badly sick.

She died a few months later, while I was just fourteen.

My father soon retired and moved with us from Texas to Washington, where I soon met Alice Elizabeth Cullen and her family.

I heard the light footsteps from Renesmee and Avory coming closer, followed by Edward's.

Avory jumped on the couch and crawled over to Alice and me.

"Hel-lo," she beamed.

"Hey hay Avy," Alice beamed back. Alice will be the best Mom, I can assure you that. So caring, protective and sweet. I'm blessed with her.

Emmett patted his brother's shoulder.

You could clearly see how fucking shitting nervous and on his nerves Edward was. He was unfolding and folding his hands, running his hands through his hair, biting his lip and fingernails.

When someone made an unexpected sound, his eyes shot up to the staircase.

"Jeez, Edward! You make me fucking crazy over here," Emmett exclaimed.

As a response, he got a killing glance from Edward. He didn't say anything after that.

We all didn't really know what to do.

Tanya had soon left after both Bella and Edward had ran off. She said she would come over another time.

Poor her, Edward hadn't even noticed she was gone. Not that I blamed him.

Suddenly, Edward shot up and had disappeared to the staircase.

We all followed.

There she was again. Bella.

As soon as she had gotten downstairs, Edward enclosed her in his arms.

Alice smiled to me. I smiled back and kissed her forehead.

Bella and Edward soon left upstairs, under the excuse of bringing the girls to bed. But oh man, that boy was going to take full advantage of having his girl back. It would be a wild night.

Emmett and I both smirked and gave Edward a wink.

"Someone interested in food?" Esme laughed.

Totally forgotten I hadn't had dinner, yet. But I wasn't hungry for _food. _I was hungry for something else, someone…

It was as if Alice thought exactly the same. "You're hungry?"

"Not for food," I smiled.

She giggled and bit her lip. "Let's satisfy you, then."

My God, this woman was Queen.

"Let's satisfy us," I agreed, and we rushed to our room.

**Play List:**

**$ The Gossip – Heavy Cross  
****$ The Velvet Underground – Here She Comes Now  
****$ Mew – 156  
****$ New Found Glory – Hold My Hand  
****$ Patti Smith – Smells Like Team Spirit  
****$ The Sounds – Much Too Long Now**


	10. Rosalie: Back

**Rosalie time!**

**Really freaking sorry for the long wait. I'd finished and typed this chapter a _long _time ago, but me being a huge lazy-ass posted it just today. **

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyers owns the Twilight books, I own my Twilight obsession.**

**Much of love and thanks to my Beta _With The What Now. _You rock and rule! Just as_ Kikijay83, _you sweep me away with your sweet and supportive reviews. Words cannot express how grateful and thankful I am, and how much it means to me.**

**IMPORTANT: This takes place BEFORE Bella's return.**

_RPOV_

I am a lucky woman.

Every morning I get to wake up with the most amazing, beautiful, passionate and caring man in the entire world.

Every evening I get to fall asleep in his strong, sweet arms.

Emmett Carter Cullen.

For three months, I've been able to call him my husband and we expect to welcome our first child in November.

I can't wait.

But just as everyone else's, my life isn't perfect.

Since we're very close with both our families – I have two older and two younger brothers: Patrick, Hudson, Tim and Alfie- we go through everything _together. _

When Bella disappeared, we lost a fiancée, mother, best friend, sister(-in-law), daughter(-in-law). It was as if Bella was one of our own.

A hole was punched into our family, and everything turned grey and sober; it was like we were limited to only being able to breathe, and that was all.

It was scary.

Being the pessimist, I believed Bella was dead.

I didn't want to get my hopes up again.

I've been let down many times and very often in my life, and I don't want that to happen again.

With my eyes closed, I felt Emmett's breath over the right side of my face and shoulder. A moan escaped my mouth.

Em chuckled and I started to laugh along with him. Rolling onto my side, I finally opened my eyes.

Gosh, how badly I loved this man. I adore him, crave him, admire him, like him, need him, breathe him, live for him.

"Hey angel," he whispered, and opened his arms for me.

I happily shoved myself against his cool yet warm body, filling his chest with kisses.

"Hey, you gonna be okay with my sisters and the girls?"

"Em, don't worry about me. Are _you _gonna be okay?"

"Absolutely," he grinned.

"Don't mess with Edward too much," I warned him.

"We won't. We're just gonna have some good ol' fun," he said, but before I could interrupt him, he jumped out of bed. "Well, I'm getting ready. I don't want to be later than Edward. I have a reputation to behold."

I rolled my eyes and slapped his ass as he grabbed some underwear from the drawers next to me.

He shot me a look, trying to be dangerous, but it only made me laugh more.

* * *

Alice and I had just finished our lunch, and were heading to this amazing looking shop, when her cell rang.

"Honor," she mouthed after the person on the line had proposed itself. Alice's face soon went into a panicked expression, but after Honor had said something she relaxed.

No need to worry.

But then she gasped.

"Al, what's going on? What happened?"

"Really? Bella?" Alice asked Honor.

Wait, what?! Bella?

I didn't pay attention to Alice anymore. I just couldn't.

This couldn't be true right?

This had to be some kind of dream. I pinched my arm to see if I were dreaming, but I was still in the mall.

Within minutes, Alice told me that the girls had run into Bella.

Then it really hit me.

Oh. My. _God_, it was really true! Bella was alive.

I don't believe in God or religion, but thank you, Lord, for bringing Bella back in our lives. Thank you. Thank you.

Alice was driving and whenever we had to slow down, we both swore loudly. Once, we even gave a trucker the finger. _Asshole_.

Honor, the girls _and _Bella were going to be picked up by Esme. Alice and I were now almost at the Cullen mansion, both impatient and bouncy to see Bella again.

When we arrived, Alice headed to the stairs to see Bella. I thought it better to wait for a while. I could imagine how fucking intimitating this would be, knowing you know them but also not knowing them. And Alice was Bella's best friend. They deserved some time alone. The girls came downstairs to help Esme with dinner and I joined them.

When Bella and Alice came back from the forest - Alice had shown Bella the cottage, I was in the living room. Even though I'd said to myself to keep my distance for a little while, I couldn't hold the urge to see her anymore. I slowly walked over to the kitchen.

Bella was washing her hands and laughing with her girls, Esme and Alice.

"Bella," I let out and she rushed to my side.

"Rose," she muttered in my hair.

"You remember me?"

"How can I not remember you?" she laughed. "No, but they told me your name. It feels like my memories are all so close, but yet so far away," she blushed.

"Well, you're still the same as three years ago, Em would say. Still blushing," I joked.

Bella laughed.

_**Play List:**_  
**+ The Cure – Love Song**  
**+ The Smiths – There Is A Light That Never Goes Out**  
**+ Jack's Mannequin – Dark Blue**  
**+ Belle & Sebastian – Sukie in the Graveyard**  
**+ Taking Back Sunday – Making Damn Sure**  
**+ Muse – Supermassive Black Hole**  
**+ Voxtrot – Your Biggest Fan**  
**+ The Strokes – Last Night**  
**+ Violent Femmes – Kiss Off**

**Reviews would be very damn welcome! Cos I let you wait so long, I'll give you another chapter. Nice, huh?**


	11. Esme: Healed

**As promised another chapter. Esme this time. I've one other chapter written and typed, but that needs some slight editing. For the rest, I think there will be 3 more chapters. One in Carlisle's POV, one in Bella's and one in Edward's. The chapter just spoken of is in...of course...little Avory's. **

**Once again, thank you to my freaking amazing Beta _With The What Now._**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns it all.**

_EsPOV_

It wasn't until I was making breakfast for _eleven _people instead if ten, that I realized how crippled our family and lives had been.

Of course, we missed Bella like crazy every single day, but my life hadn't seemed any different than before her disappearance.

But now, everything looked much brighter, much happier.

I smiled.

My youngest son, Edward, was the first to come downstairs and into the kitchen after a nights sleep. On the way to the sink, he kissed my cheek. "Good morning, Mom."

My smile grew wider, if possible. "Hey honey. Up so early?"

"Some things never change," he shrugged matter-of-factly, putting bread in the toaster.

"What about Bella?"

"Still asleep. I didn't want to wake her; she needs rest. We're going to Seattle today, to grab her stuff from the hotel. Later in the week we'll go to her old house in San Diego. Then we'll have to contact her parents and family, I guess."

I leaned over to my son and stroked his cheek. "I love you, Edward. And I'm _so _proud of you."

He turned his head and kissed my hand. "Love you too, Mom."

"Keep an eye on your toast," I laughed.

"Mom," he groaned.

"Hey, I'm just sayin'," I defended myself. "You never know, you may end up with burnt toast."

Soon, everyone had woken up and we were all seated around the breakfast bar. All intertwined with our partners, except Honor.

She was playing with Ness and Ave, but I knew she was seeing someone on campus. I just felt and could see the brightening in her behavior and in my little girl's eyes, which meant she was in love.

I looked around and the sight was heart-warming.

My husband, children, children-in-law and granddaughters were all happy, smiling and laughing. It was as if we were surrounded by the sun.

It was so different and so much better than any of the breakfasts we'd had in the past three years. It's almost as if it was always raining, always thunder, always grey. No life, no fun.

But it all has changed now.

And I'm more than grateful for that.

My family is healed.

The sun has come out

Finally.

_**Play List:**_  
**% The Clash – Police On My Back**  
**% Patti Smith – Because The Night**  
**% Radiohead – Fake Plastic Trees**  
**% Red Hot Chilli Peppers – Minor Thing**  
**% Pete Yorn – Just Another**

**To make something clear: ****Bella woke up in a hospital in San Francisco, but lived in San Diego before she went up to Seattle to find her girls.**

**I know it's a shortie, once again, but that's how this chapter is.**

**Other story news:  
~Dating Fame: chapter 16 is close to finished, just small parts need to be written and I need to over look the whole. Afraid it's going to be a lenghty one again.  
~Sun, BFF's and Love in LA: I think it's good for myself and the story to take a step back and go on with it as soon as I feel the urge again. I do have a couple of ideas, but it are just little waves.  
~London Calling: lazy ass alarm again. I've quite a lot material written, just need to be typed.  
~Never More: I haven't touched it for so long, but it was never my intention to let it be. I hope to have formed a chapter anytime soon.  
~Deathpoint: it will be deleted from FanFiction soon.**


	12. Avory: Lucky

**Sorry for the long wait. I've been writing on the 3 remaining chapters, but they aren't finished yet. **

**Thanks to my Beta _With The What Now_ and to those who reviewed. It means a lot to me.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I own my writing.**

**Say hey-hay to little sweet Avory Elizabeth Cullen! :)**

* * *

_AvPOV_

Mommy was back.

My Mommy. Was Back.

I had been too young to remember her, but when I saw her on the playground, I knew it was her.

How many times had I thought about her, what she would do, where she was, how we would reunite again, how she would have looked in the wedding.

I had been afraid to really lose her. I had been afraid that I really and totally would forget her, that she would just become a beautiful woman on photos and in videos. I had tried as hard as I could to not let that happen.

But, lucky me, I don't have to worry about that anymore.

Mommy is back and everyone is happy again.

I've never seen my Daddy so happy and smiling as he is now.

It has been a week since Mommy got back, and she and Daddy are going to marry on August 13.

And you know what? Renesmee – that's my big sister – and I get to be bridesmaids!

Auntie Alice promised us we will get to wear the most beautiful dresses she can get.

A dream coming true.

When I am just as old as Mommy and Daddy, I want to be a dancer or writer.

I'm in a ballet class for toddlers – gah I hate that word and I can't wait to get to a 'normal' class – and I love to dance as much as I can, wherever I am.

I also like to make up stories and families and such.

With the help of my family, I made a family tree of all my fluffy animals and dolls.

"Ava, are you coming?" my auntie Alice asked, while opening the door of my room.

"Yup," I said, shoving off my bed.

I grabbed my Burberry coat off the hook and pulled on my Vans slip-ons.

I wasn't really handy-pandy with laces yet, so these shoes were perfect.

Alice smiled down at me and took my hand.

"Gownie shopping, here we come," I joked and saluted, just as I'd seen doing soldiers on TV like that.

Rose the pose, Hon, Ness, granny and Mommy were already downstairs.

The guys, whom I mean my uncies Emmy and Jazzy and my Daddy – who's name is Edward – were hanging around in the music room.

"Have fun," they called after us.

Sure we would have a _lot _of fun!

Girl time!

* * *

**Sorry for it being so short. **

**Avory is three-and-a-half-year old, so I tried to write in her kind of language.**

**_My schedule_  
13th July: away to the USA. (Anyone got tips for San Francisco, San Diego and LA)  
7th August: return**

**I don't know if I'll be able to post while on vacation. I'll try my best, but I can't guarantee anything.**

**_Play List:  
_**{ Cartel – Matter of Time  
{ The Strokes – You Only Live Once  
{ Hellogoodbye – All Of Your Love  
{ Joanna Newsom – Peach Plum Pear  
{ Angus & Julia Stone – Bella


End file.
